"The
Zone Where Everything is Twilighty and Such!"
By TJ Foss (Sea Hawk)
SPOOKY
NARRATOR GUY: Submittied for your approval (or disapproval.
I really don't care): A postal service unlike any other. One
that delivers all over reality, between the gateways of alternate
universes. This postal service is normal in only one way:
All the employees are totally incompetent. You are about to
enter...
THE
ZONE WHERE EVERYTHING IS TWILIGHTY AND SUCH!
(Close
in on Snake Mountain. Skeletor holds a large package)
SKELETOR:
Oooh! Present! Gimmee gimmee!! (He tears it open, revealing
a large wheel) My new Wheel of Infinity came! Yay! *clears
throat* I mean...With this new Wheel of Infinity, I shall
destroy He-Man! (He Spins it) Aha! Hahahahahahahaha...ha..a--*
Why isn't it growing larger and destroying things? And what's
this little card? (Pulls a card off the wheel's stand) "Never
ask what hot dogs are made of?" What does that mean? What's
a 'hot dog'?
BEAST
MAN: I can tell you...
SKELETOR:
Maybe it was a mistake. (Spins it again, then pulls the next
card off) "If at first you don't succeed, put your underwear
on your head and dance around singing 'Yes, we have no Bananas.'
(Fade
out. Close in on Burbank, CA, the Warner Brothers Water Tower.
The Warner Brothers and their incredibly cute sister, Dot,
stand around a large box)
WAKKO:
Oooh, a present! Gimmee, gimmee! (He pries the slats off with
a large crowbar, revealing a large yellow, free-floating wheel)
DOT:
What did they do to the Wheel of Morality?
YAKKO:
We got a bigger budget. The network wanted bigger special
effects.
WAKKO:
Let's try it out! (Yakko spins the wheel)
YAKKO:
Wheel of Morality, turn turn turn, tell us the lesson that
we should learn.
DOT:
Why's it getting bigger?
WAKKO:
What happened to the moral?
YAKKO:
Oh boy, the censors are going to have a field day. Hey, it's
not stopping...uh-oh...
(Meanwhile,
on Eternia)
HE-MAN:
It's a good thing we defeated Skeletor this time.
BATTLE
CAT: What's he doing?
SKELETOR
(With his underwear on his head as he dances): Yes we have
no bananas! Yes we have no bananas! Bananas! Bananas!